I feel like a bitch. I take people for granted. I don't give people chances to get to know me better. At most, I told them the me that was potrayed ever since I'm in poly.
I want people to know the real me; the sad, emo girl deep inside but I couldn't do it. it was depressing as I'm constantly bottling myself up with these feelings that are dying to come out. I can't seem to trust anyone that much like I did the last time when I was 12.
I guess being betrayed when I was 12 made me close myself up for a while. I barely managed to do it again when I was 15 but then I realised i must have deluded myself to believe I trust people. What proved me wrong was that I found out what I told someone is being circulated among the others. It hurts to know that your secret can just be blurted out to others as if it was nothing.
Growing up, currently now 19, I felt even worse. Even though I had friends along the way, I still find myself hard to talk to others about what really happened to me in the past. No one ever knows the things that happened. I was always alone and dare not let it out.
I think I should do it especially since I am surrounded with friends I hang out with since I was 14. No more delusions;no more betrayals; no more doubts.
No comments:
Post a Comment